-Forgiveness-

Being sentenced to 15 years in federal prison is a very out-of-body experience. I felt powerless that dreadful day. A judge looked at me with disgust in his eyes and determined that my poor business decisions warranted 188 months (15 years + 8 months) behind barbed wire fences.

On November 25th, 2024, I had to account and pay the toll for EVERY bad decision I had made in the last few years. Forgiveness and grace were NOWHERE to be found in that federal courtroom. Past investors were hurt by my short sighted business decisions and wanted their pound of flesh — and boy, did they get it. About 15.8 lbs of it, to be exact. Punishment and persecution filled the room. A deep hate toward me had hardened so many hearts that afternoon. Noel was sitting in the front row of the packed courtroom and will testify to the cold darkness that surrounded all of us.

Just to be clear, I'M NOT THE VICTIM in this story. I made VERY high-risk business decisions that hurt my wife, kids, past employees, and past investors. I could have done better and should have done better. I was given an incredible opportunity at a very young age and absolutely blew it in a big way. I should have been a better friend, husband, father, boss, and steward. I'm so, so, so sorry my decisions hurt so many people. I can only hope to prove worthy of their forgiveness someday in the future.

Okay, back to the day I was sentenced to federal prison.

By the time my day of sentencing rolled around, I was prepared to make my wife and kids proud. No matter what the judge, prosecutor, and past investors said about me that day, I would prove worthy of Noel’s, Cambria’s, Willow’s, Lula’s, and Zion’s support.

I was confident about my new path in life because several years prior to my day of sentencing, Noel had given me the greatest gift. She unconditionally forgave me for my shortsighted business decisions. She showered me with grace, compassion, and love. Noel picked me up off the ground when I was at my absolute lowest. My wife spoke truth into my life. Noel showed me what the heart of Jesus REALLY looks like. My wonderful wife was and is a walking embodiment of the power of Christ. I'm forever blessed to be her husband.

As I looked around the cold and dark courtroom, I felt a tug on my soul. This undeniable tugging had nothing to do with the decade-and-a-half prison sentence the federal judge had just imposed on me.

The pull on my heart as I looked around the courtroom was simple and spiritual. It’s hard to explain in words, but my best attempt at explaining this surreal moment is that I had an out-of-body thought. I was in the room but not in the room.

As FBI agents, federal prosecutors, district attorneys, and probation officers walked past me congratulating each other on the length of my sentence, I thought to myself:

“What if Jesus had never died on the cross for us and rose from the dead? That would mean EVERY mom, dad, brother, sister, son, and daughter would have to account for ALL their sins — just like me today.”

At that moment, I felt the FULL MAGNITUDE of what Jesus did for ALL of us. I stared into the courtroom seats and envisioned an innocent man standing up and saying He would serve my prison sentence for me. I now clearly understood that this is what Jesus did for all of us. He died and rose again so ALL of us could be forgiven of our “short sighted” decisions (A.K.A. sins). Jesus washed away ALL of our sins so we could be made new.

It took me getting sentenced to federal freakin’ prison to understand the TRUE power of the cross. Prior to my incarceration, the cross felt like a nice and convenient metaphor. Now the cross means everything to me. I am a man who needs the cross daily. Jesus died on the cross so I could be forgiven. Jesus set me free through forgiveness. None of us deserve this gift, but Jesus gave it to us anyway.

Look, I absolutely hate being in prison and not seeing my amazing family, but I honestly feel more “free” than I ever have in my life. This is the power of forgiveness and the message of Jesus. I'm surrounded by men who have been beaten down by pain and persecution. They have been told over and over and over again that they are unworthy of forgiveness. I promise you this is NOT the answer or the way. It breeds a cycle of hate that will consume generations. I very much plan to show my fellow prisoners the power of forgiveness and the love of Jesus.

All day long, I walk around and say the same prayer in my head over and over:

“Lord, thank you for dying on the cross for a man like me.”
“Thank you for forgiving me.”
“Thank you for the grace and love you have shown me through my wife and kids.”

Whenever I feel overwhelmed or lonely in prison, I like to close my eyes and picture myself sitting back in that federal courtroom. I imagine the judge getting ready to deliver his harsh sentence on me, but this time an innocent man stands up and says, ‘I will serve this man’s sentence. He is my son, and he is loved.’ I then visualize the judge turning toward me and saying, ‘Mr. Bartlett, YOU HAVE BEEN FORGIVEN. GO AND SPREAD THIS GOOD NEWS WITH OTHERS.’

Forgiveness is powerful, my friends. Let’s walk in this freedom together.

Thankful for all of you (especially my wonderful wife, Noel).

Love,
Brett