-Prison Is NOT Our Home-

 

Random Prisoner:
"DUDE!!! You know that guy named Demon went and got a (sharp object) after you politely told him NOT to sit there. He was waiting for you in his cell."

The Networker:
"Man, all I did was mention that someone was already in the chair he wanted. That’s totally crazy he got that upset at me."

Me:
"I’m proud of you, The Networker, for ignoring Demon’s invitation to invoke violence and walking away. Whenever you get in a tense prison moment like that, just picture your precious 10-year-old son waiting for his daddy to return home."

The Networker:
"Thank you. You’re right. Prison will NEVER be my home. I need to get back to my REAL home. My son needs me."

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The “man” appropriately named Demon is a pathetic inmate who committed disgusting crimes against children and proudly proclaims his sinister sins. He even tattooed his criminal charges all over his body so that every prisoner knows why he is here. This “man” loves prison and has made it his dark and demonic home.

Demon only lives a few cells down from The Networker. A minor misunderstanding about a chair could have had catastrophic consequences.

In my opinion, The Networker displayed phenomenal discipline by ignoring Demon’s invitation to settle a simple disagreement using violence.

I’m so proud of my friend for putting his son first in a moment of tension.

In the past, The Networker would have felt compelled to prove his “manliness” to our peers in prison. But now, my dear friend knows PRISON IS NOT HIS HOME. He is fully focused on returning back to his REAL home and becoming the father his adorable son deserves. This MAN is dedicated to proving worthy of his 10-year-old son’s unconditional love and support. He is ready and willing to make his son proud.

The Networker’s prison journey now has a clear purpose and meaning. He is going to return home as a strong, wise, and patient father. His future wife will be blessed by this man’s ability to practice patience. His family’s future is bright because he chose to turn the obstacle of prison into a launching pad instead of a graveyard. The Networker has found a way to make his people PROUD of his prison journey, and I’m honored to walk beside him.

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Cambria, my sweet and beautiful daughter, Daddy is keeping his promise. I told you I would use this prison sentence to help “sad dads” reconnect with their families. Every day in here, I’m doing exactly that. Every conversation, every moment of mentorship, every chance I get—I’m pulling men back toward the families that are praying for them.

Here’s the truth most people never see: every dad in federal prison eventually faces a life-changing choice. He can make prison his new home and surrender to the darkness… or he can choose the harder path and refuse to let this place define him. He can choose to use this time as a training ground to become a better father, husband, and man and CHOOSE to NEVER make prison home. Unfortunately, most choose the first path. Their shame hardens them, their hope fades, and prison swallows not just their identity—but their families too.

Unfortunately, the vast majority of my barbwire brothers carry so much regret and shame that they inevitably CHOOSE to make this snake pit their new home. Slowly but surely, their hearts are hardened inside their new “home,” and the prison machine swallows their entire family whole.

There are approximately 1,000ish inmates on this federal compound that confines me. Out of the 1,000+ men trapped here, only five of us have decided that PRISON WILL NEVER BE OUR HOME.

Our small band of barbwire brothers stands out in a sea of severely “institutionalized” men.

On the hard days of our incarceration, our band of barbwire brothers speaks TRUTH into each other’s lives. Our small crew works together to pick one another off the ground when the weight of these prison walls is strangling our hope for a better future.

Whenever we see one of our brothers getting wobbly from the painful punches of prison, we respectfully encourage/remind them to:

• “Picture your mom worrying at home right now and praying for your safe return. She believes in YOU!!!”

• “Imagine your son right now, eagerly waiting for you in his room. He wants to show his dad all the cool new toys he got for Christmas.”

• “Pretend you’re dancing with your daughter tonight on your first ever DADDY-DAUGHTER DATE NIGHT.”

All of these gentle reminders of our REAL home whittle away the weight we convicted felons feel on a daily basis.

Please don’t misunderstand my statements above. WE BARBWIRE BROTHERS ARE NOT THE VICTIMS OF THIS STORY.
Every single one of us sentenced to prison made stupid and short sighted mistakes. Now we are broken men/fathers/sons/brothers/uncles doing everything possible to reconcile with society and EARN our way home.

At night, right before our 9pm stand-up count, our small band of barbwire brothers DREAM BIG DREAMS together during our peanut butter parties.

While sitting in our cells, we envision all the incredible moments we are going to spend with our daughters, sons, and families when we return back to our REAL HOMES.

Inmates like Demon will do everything within their power to drag us down into their dark abyss of incarceration. But my brothers and I know exactly who we are fighting for. We know who we want to be. And we know who is waiting for us. We will stay focused on the LONG march back home to our loved ones. They need us and deserve the best in life.

Prison, you can inflict me and my brothers with pain and pressure all day, every day.

We can take it — and we will smile through it.

We know our brokenness makes us strong because we have laid our shame at the feet of Jesus.

Our lives will be living proof of the redeeming power of Christ.

The devil will NOT win in this den of darkness.

Romans 5:3-4 "Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope."

Please continue to pray for enduring strength and a shield of protection for me and my barbwire brothers.

I’m so blessed to have these courageous men in my life.

Thank You, Lord, for Your never-ending grace and unconditional love. Us broken men cherish these priceless gifts.

Sincerely,
Brett
(A convicted felon focused on returning to his REAL home)

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– A Note From Noél –

Oh Jesus, Please bring Brett home NOW!!!! I’M BEGGING YOU!!! Sentence him to several decades of home confinement and garnish 100% of his wages FOREVER. 

It really doesn’t matter to me — I just want my husband out of that horrible and dangerous pit called prison.

Cambria, Willow, Lula, and Zion need their father back home safe and secure.

And I need my husband!

I understand that this letter may not be as uplifting as some of the others — it’s more about the real side of our families daily reality. This is my prayer on most days, and although we’ve made it through 9 long months, it has come with excruciatingly painful, gut-wrenching days.

It’s honestly hard to comprehend what Brett and his band of barbwire brothers face on a daily basis. And I already know Brett “forgets” to tell me about half of the dangerous situations he walks through in there.

I’m sure “The Band of Barbwire Brothers” and their one-of-a-kind approach to prison is NOT warmly embraced by their peers who are entrenched in typical “prison life.”

The fact that this UNHINGED Demon guy would grab a “sharp object” over a minor seating arrangement sends cold shivers up and down my spine.

Life as a “prison wife” is brutally hard in ways most people will never understand. With even the slightest gap in communication, our minds go straight to the darkest possibilities. One single day of the prison phones being “down” is all it takes for my heart to drop into that terrifying “what if” abyss.

Questioning your husband’s safety every single day… wondering if he’s okay… praying he’s still safe behind those walls… it’s a weight that sits on your chest from the moment you wake up until the moment you finally fall asleep. I wouldn’t wish this reality on my worst enemy.

And yet, please don’t get me wrong — I am EXTREMELY PROUD of Brett’s prison journey. He is following through on ALL his promises and proving me, Cambria, Willow, Lula, and Zion RIGHT for loving him through the darkest season of his life.

But Brett is still just flesh, blood, and bones. And the truth is… all it takes is one of the 1,000+ inmates he lives around to have a bad day and take it out on him. One moment. One decision. One violent outburst. BOOM — our family’s life could be changed forever, all over again.

When waves of fear hit me, I don’t get the privilege of sending him a quick text or calling him back. Most of our entire relationship right now revolves around one single 15-minute phone call a day. THAT'S IT. That tiny window is all we get to hold each other’s hearts together.

Adjusting to this limited, fragile form of communication has been painful for me and for the kids — Cambria, Willow, Lula, and Zion. We’re doing our best, but some days… some days it just hurts worse.

But we are BARTLETTS — and Bartlett's don’t quit. As a family, we will keep fighting through this obstacle called prison and we WILL overcome it. These last few days have just been harder on me, because I miss my favorite person in the world so deeply it physically aches.

Please continue to pray for Brett and his Band of Barbwire Brothers.

Lord Jesus,
Please continue to place a shield of protection around these men so they can safely return home to their sons, daughters, and loved ones.
Continue to fuel them with HOPE for a better future.
Give them the strength to endure the marathon of incarceration.
At night when they are fast asleep, give them detailed dreams of spending time with their families. Lord, please continue to pave a safe path that brings these men back to their REAL HOMES.
AMEN!!!!

I love all of you so much. Thank you for letting me share my heart today. Your support means more to me than you will ever know.

With so much love,
Noél
(A worried and PROUD prison wife)